Once, a lifetime ago in fact- I sent a man I admired/desired greatly a package of heirloom seeds in the mail. To me, -one of the most outrageously sensual and romantic gestures known to mankind. I’m not sure the man in question quite understood the layers of inherent meaning and veiled passion though…perhaps I should have written this article a lot earlier? Our early courtship centred around plants…specifically food and fragrance plants. Devour and inhale, -sound familiar? :-) Together we planned the purchase of old English apple varietals like the Cox’s Orange Pippin and wrote of its taste: perfumed honey-sweet juice released by the first perfect crunch into a stripy orange heart and just the right amount of acidity. We researched the growing needs and habits of Chicago Warted Hubbard Squash: roasted in butter, maple syrup and a sprinkling of smoky chipotle, served with whipped cream cheese. We nurtured green pineapple tomatoes from seed: These orbs of chartreuse decadence to be eaten straight from the vine, warmed by the sun. Seeds and juices bursting inelegantly into waiting mouths, running through the crevices of the gardener’s hands.
“Show me a garden that’s bursting into life” –Snow Patrol ‘Chasing Cars’.
It is no mere accident that the biblical “Garden of Eden” was the first human paradise.
The aforementioned man lived a long way away. We hadn’t the luxury of touch that normal lovers enjoy. We had words, occasional telephone calls and this huge desire to grow things together/apart and then consume them within the same universe, under the same sky. Consume (verb): To eat up, devour, ingest, swallow, gobble, wolf down, gorge oneself on, feast on, to enjoy avidly, to engage fully…to use up, to do away with completely{1}.
Unable to ‘consume/consummate’ formally, we embraced the earth together/apart. Of course, such things come to their natural end, as things do, -death and transformation and all that…but the gift of seeds still remains as the most universally loving gift I could ever have devised. This paper will attempt to elucidate the biggest small word in the english language: 'why'. Why a gift of seeds instead of, y'know, naughty photos, or used (ewww!) lingerie, or any of the other accepted missives of affection? What's wrong with a nice watch? Why not a bunch of hot-house red roses with a sexy message on a florist's card? No effort. Gifts that can be bought, 'consumed' by both giver and recipient with nothing more than exchange of cash are a bit...lazy really. Nothing to lose, nothing to learn. The fast-food of love. I'll admit, possibly useful in a busy world, but not thoughtful. Y'know, actually thoughtful....involving 'thoughts'. Anyway anyway...
WORKING THE SOIL
It is no great secret to gardeners and chefs the world over that everything depends on the soil, the living, breathing ‘skin’ of the planet. Into this exquisite orchestra of bacteria, fungi, actinomycetes, algae, protozoa, nematodes, insects, mites, rodents and earthworms, and the products of their metabolism {2] we plant our seeds. Chances are high that the soil we have access to will not be in peak condition. For the home gardener, muscle and sweat will be required to steward this ‘skin’ into the best possible condition. Invasive weeds and grasses will be removed piece by agonizing piece (if you have ever tried to remove grass-roots from soil, you will know exactly what I mean). Your body will work hard. You may bleed. Little bits of you fall into it, and little bits of it fall into you. It is no accident that farmers and agriculturalists become emotionally attached to their land. It is a delicate dance. Some microbes may light neural pathways and act as a potent ‘high ’[3] while others can maim or kill [4]. From the outset, we are involved in a physically demanding quest that promises either riches or peril, a trope that humans have never been able to resist very efficiently! (Remember Ulysses?) The work is physical, hot, sweaty…in plunges the spade, earth parts at the invasion…you feed it and nurture it until it is a soft, vibrant dark mass of fertility and potentiality. Then, and only then do you consider planting a precious seed. “God! That was hard, dirty work…want to hop in a shower together?” The metaphor is not subtle :-)
WHAT SHALL WE GROW?
I personally know many people who could not ever, -not in a bazillion lifetimes equate the word ‘vegetable’ with the word ‘sexy’. I maintain that had they created soil that was heaving with possibility, nurtured a seed to fertile adulthood, harvested in the autumn sun and then prepared and consumed said vegetable with love, care and artistry…they would feel very differently. There is a growing army of chefs and gastronomes giving me a universal “hallelujah” right now in fact.
If you haven’t ever experienced the pure and breathless anticipation of the heirloom seed catalogue (often ‘consumed’ in the dead of winter before a blazing fire with a glass of fine wine) you are missing out one of life’s greatest pleasures. I can only imagine that differently motivated women get the same warm flush from perusing a yet-to-be-released spring fashion collection, or the latest Swarovski catalogue…but I digress.
This part is all about anticipation, dreaming, -fantasy if you will. It looks amazing…but how will s/he, sorry ‘it’, taste? Where and how will s/he/it grow best? How much attention will it need (yes, I dispensed with the ‘s/he’…you get the idea..), is it ‘fussy’, ‘temperamental’? Maybe it’ll be worth a bit of extra effort for the eventual flavour…What does it need? What are its ideal companions? How long do I have to wait??!! Such musings are very common to the gardener/chef/gastronome when the world outside is snowy and sleeping soundly. We must add to this the normal human battle between the comfort and satisfaction of the ‘old’, -the crops you grow every year, the dependable heavy fruiters, the staples of fridge and pantry and the alluring, tantalising (but risky) ‘new’…I will admit that I often lean towards the unknown. Did I say ‘lean’? I probably should have said ‘leap’.
One attempts to balance common-sense with decadence. Attempts. I often end up with pages and pages of seeds to be ordered…$500+ at $2.50 a packet. Do I want the cosmic eclipse, violet jasper, green pineapple, chocolate pear and Wapsipincon peach tomatoes? ALL?...Oh yes, -with all my heart! Do I own 20 acres?...nope. The sorrowful elimination process begins. The planned garden is now more focused, concentrated. We are reducing in order to perfect and enhance. Excitement builds again.
We map, we plan, we watch the movement of sun and rain over our piece of earth. Alchemists of potentiate verdancy, we calculate, dispose of, calculate again and often settle on a far less scientific method: how it feels. Some gardeners are quite ‘paint-by-numbers’, -all miniscule signs and military rows, others (hands-up guilty) are a bit more Pro Hart about the whole matter. “If you employ random planting, how the hell do you know that what you just dug up is a white beet and not a poisonous lily corm or some-such?”Experience. Smell. Memory. Knowledge. Instinct. Beware of overly mathematical gardeners, they will very often approach other forms of pleasure with similar precision parameters and exhibit a parallel dearth of instinct and spontaneity :).
Same goes for chefs. It’s usually the rule-breakers that will redefine what is to ‘consume’ or ‘be consumed’ (by flavour and texture! This is not a Grimm tale…ergh). More on that later…oddly fascinating and entirely disturbing. Yet we do quite willingly consume parts of other humans don’t we?...No. Settle down. You’re going to have to wait for that bit. Anticipation…remember?
One freezing day there’s a padded parcel in the letter-box. In my world, it’s more exciting than an envelope marked ‘Lotteries Office’. Whisked inside with fervent haste, the packets are laid out lovingly in a collage of potential…now to wait until spring. Patience is not now, nor ever has been one of my primary virtues…but spring will come as it pleases, and no amount of stomping and tantrum-throwing on my part will hasten its arrival. Not that I mightn’t indulge anyway…a bit :-)
REFERENCES
1. Merriam-Webster Dictionary https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/consume
2. Wagg, C., Bender, S.F., Widemer, F., van der Heijden, M.G. (2014). Soil biodiversity and soil community composition determine ecosystem multifunctionality. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, 111(10). 5266-5270. Doi: 10.1073/pnas.1320054111
3. Matthews, D.M. & Jenks, S.M. (2013). Ingestion of Mycobacterium vaccaedecreases anxiety-related behaviour and improves learning in mice. Behavioural processes, 96. 27-35
4. Currie, B.J., Ward, L., Cheng, A.C. (2010). The Epidemiology and Clinical Spectrum of Melioidosis: 540 cases from the 20 Year Darwin Prospective Study, PLOS Neglected Tropical Diseases. Nov. 30, 2010. Doi: 10.1371/journal.pnted.0000900
Stay tuned for Part 2: Nurturing & Harvest, Consumption.